This isn't going to be the most positive post.
As detailed below, I'm struggling a lot with energy levels recently. As a result, this post won't contain many images, but I'll still try to put a few asides such as this one in the post, to break it up a little.
Let's get the bad stuff out of the way
If you've been reading my blog so far, you know I've been struggling. Work slowed down for me this time last year, and since then my only reliable contract was forced to cut my hours and eventually let me go. I want to re-iterate this here and everywhere, this is not their fault. They kept me on for as long as possible, even at the direct expense of the business owner (who is a dear friend). Right now, the industry of software development and especially web and devops is extremely cutthroat, and unfortunately the place I was working for lost a good portion of their existing clientbase.
Obviously with a job loss comes financial difficulties, and I've been pushing my ko-fi page more, as I can. They do play a major part in why I've been struggling so much, but in addition; I'm just so tired.
I burned out last year, and I burned out hard. It takes every iota of energy I have just to do some of the most basic things. My daily walks stopped, I stopped looking after myself, some days getting out of bed seemed insurmountable as a task. I needed to find work, but I was bad at it. I needed to work on projects for my portfolio, revamp my website, but the energy just never came. I have enough motivation, but I would just sit in front of my text editor and no creativity would come out.
No matter what I've tried, all my creativity has gone. Very little passion is left in me at the moment, though I'm sure it'll return with proper rest.
I've not been sleeping well.
At the start of this year, for the first time since mid 2020, I self harmed. I'm not proud of it, and I don't really have anything to say. I'm tired, I'm poor and I lack the tools and energy to get myself out of this state. Every day I wake up and I try my hardest, I burn myself out a little more, just with the hope that in the future I can maybe get a little better.
With that in mind, I am, as always, searching for work. I'd like to bring some stability into my life. I will continue to do my best, push myself as much as I can, and hope for a better future.
Here's a list of the few things I've done over the past month.
Testing wz_mini_hacks
I've been having some trouble with my Neos Smartcams recently. For a number of reasons I'm not willing to go into yet, I refuse to use the Thingino firmware. Previous attempts at using it have bricked cameras and recovering from that is an entire process.
I currently use Dafang Hacks, which has a few basic functions that I use.
- RTSP stream
- MQTT control over the infrared LED and Filter
However, the hacks are a little unstable and my security software is Not A Fan of that. So I did spend some time looking at alternatives, including wz_mini_hacks. It looks like the developer of that has moved onto Thingino firmware, but there did exist a module for mini hacks that enabled MQTT control.
I do not trust projects that aggressively advertise themselves in other project's Github Issues for one.
Unfortunately, those hacks require making a Wyze account and I wasn't willing to do that, so I've been continuing to search for a simple, working soluation to my camera woes. In the meantime, I continue to tweak Frigate to enable more stable camera streams.
Home Assistant Smart Things integration
My lights broke! I hate the future!
Okay, this is mostly on me. I've actually been running a 'smart home' since 2020 or so. These days I run a full Home Assistant instance which controls a lot of devices around the home, and genuinely is more help than it is effort. Or at least, the effort I put in is enough of a fun time that I consider it worth it. There's a lot of little automations I have, such as dimming the lights as the night goes on (aiding my hard-to-control sleep disorder), and, of course, security, which I upgraded after an attempted break-in in early 2024.
My philosophy for smart home is simply: It should work offline where possible, it should work if the server fails, where possible, and it shouldn't be intrusive in my daily life. Not all of these things can be followed all the time, as budget, time and effort constraints allow, but I can endeavour to fulfill as many of the requirements as possible.
If you're interested in more SmartHome content please let me know, I do think I bring a unique attitude to it, and I'd love an opportunity to experiment more, even if I am limited by living in a rented property.
Early on, wifi bulbs were the go-to. I already had an existing wifi network, and they were cheap. Nowadays I go for Zigbee or Matter as they can work even when the wifi network is down. As a result, a few of the bulbs and sockets in my house remain on Wifi, specifically Meross branded. At the time, I connected these through Samsung SmartThings, which had the best Home Assistant integration when I set this up in 2021 or 2022.
Recently, Samsung decided that API tokens for SmartThings should have a 24 hour lifespan instead of indefinite / 1 year. I found this out by my devices going offline roughly every 24 hours, and having to re-input the API keys. It took a few days for me to realise the issue (As I assumed the API keys had just regularly expired or become invalid for some reason). Thankfully, Meross devices also have a local API that Home Assistant can now use, and my guests can sleep in darkness again.
I Fixed my 3D Printer
My 3D printer broke this last month. I'm not entirely sure when, but it stopped extruding filament. I assumed the nozzle or hotend were clogged, so I disassembled most of it in order to fix it. I changed the nozzle just in case, and, well. It didn't work!
The guides I looked at online mentioned that the bowden tube that feeds into the hotend was usually part of the hotend, and therefore irreplaceable. I couldn't extract filament from it, even after heating up the hotend to loosen the filament.
I decided to give the tube a GOOD tug anyway, and it came loose. Ordered another one online for very cheap (thank you once again to my ko-fi supporters!) and we're back up and running. All seems good after a few test prints, but the project I was working on is definitely delayed quite a bit by this.
A small conclusion
This past month has been mired by "and another thing" happening. I go to print something, my printer is broken, I go to turn on a laptop, the CMOS battery is dead, even trying to relax I go to play a game and there's an update! It's been an extremely frustrating month, and I feel like I've taken a lot of steps backwards. However, I've had a good couple of days and I'm hoping to carry that energy into February. I have so many things planned, and when the universe lets me, I'll be excited to show you all.
Thank you once again to everyone that's supported me, continues to support me. You've all saved my life in more ways than I can count. Thank you.
It won't be long until my next post is published.